Monday, August 24, 2009

One of those days

Heh. One of those days is today. Today is one of those days. Odious, aimless, hot, long (too long) days. Monday. When the rest of the world is out doing something; generally work, and you are at home spending time thinking about your next feat. Things you should really do, not to feel miserable are: CHANGE OUT OF YOUR PYJAMAS, WASH YOUR TEETH, WAKE UP EARLY and DON'T PANIC. I tend to panic, and panic on such days leads to dispair. Oh, by the way, don't tell anyone about your dilemma/dispair/aimlessness because these people are the same people that have a day's work ahead of them and going over to them moaning about how relaxed you're going to be while they're working their arse off is not what I'd call insurable behaviour.

So far so good. Amongst the things you can do are the following:

- wash your car
- take a long bath, possibly reading a chapter or two while you're there
- watch a movie online
- go on You Tube and search for "stand up commedy". Dane Cook, Carlos Mensia, Jeff Dunham and so on and so forth.
- Put some cucumber slices on your eyes and while you're there, try to invent a nice fairytale with you as protagonist. You'll come to realise that as simple as they might sound, fairytales are mighty hard to make up and make sense. Please, don't be shocked when later you feel stupid that you were making up a fairytale.. with additional cucumbers on your eyes.
- take out your Memories Box and go through it. And your photo albums, and leaf through them.
- Go out, somewhere within walking distance (tssk, EVERYWHERE is within walking distance in Malta!), and buy something stupid and cheap; like a rubber or insect spray.
- Try on clothes, mix and match. Experiment some new combinates. You'll be surprised how much potential your wardrobe has.
- Cook something! A nice chocolate cake, or some blueberry buns. Njam.
- Go to the Dvd Rentals and rent a dvd. No, don't eventually watch it. Just go there and spend time searching for it.
- Drink a shandy on the roof of your house. Its important that you drink Shandy, not beer. You'll see why when you do.
- Go and have lunch somewhere relaxing. On. Your. Own.
- And for Dinner? Obviously.. SUSHI! :D

is that enough for a day? I think so. : )

Amen

Sunday, August 23, 2009

it turns out that..

It turns out that Prince Charmings exist, but they are oh so boringly perfect.

It turns out that sushi is delicious!

It turns out that life is short.

It turns out that life is short and complicated.

It turns out that life is short, complicated, but extremely simple to figure out.

It turns out that mothers are always right.

It turns out that good looks get you wherever you like.

It turns out that to look good you have to feel good.

It turns out that in life there will always be someone that is better than you, no matter how hard you try.

It turns out that all men have the same thing in mind..

It turns out that women like it that way, somehow.

It turns out that the harder you look for something, the less you are going to find it.

It turns out that even a silver stick has a dirty part.. nothing is perfect.

It turns out that life has very queer coincidences.

It turns out that that they are still coincidences.

It turns out that menopause is horrid on women.

It turns out that it is even worse for their husbands.

It turns out that younger sibblings are always the better off.

It turns out that the length of your legs is inversely proportional to the size of your brain.

It turns out that the answer to the ultimate question about life, the universe and everything IS 42.

It turns out that it is also the largest number you can use in Super 5, by a strange coincidence.

It turns out that life is fair after all.. €1,000,000 had to be split between 2 rather than 1 lucky winner.

It turns out that many women are arses when driving.

It turns out that this doesn't mean that men are good drivers.. on the contrary.

It turns out that whatever disress you might have, someone else is in a worse state than you.

It turns out that you start wondering who the poor guy is.


AMEN.

Ps, it turns out that these are the revelations of just one day.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Pause

Ah.. life is stressful. Put aside all the work, relationships, chores, problems, fights, meals (heh), birthdays etc etc etc. You'd think that without all those, life would suddenly lighten up and feel better. Well, I am ready to bet whichever part of my body I have not yet betted in the past blogs that life would still be a pain in the lower regions of my back. Why? very simple. Because life minus all the stressful things leaves ...

life - stressful things = US

And us, ourselves, are also a source of stress. No one can deny this. We spend so much time and money and tears (at least I do) to look and feel good that probably, with another simple sum we'd realise that we are our greatest source of stress. It's so hard to not worry about what people think or will think about us. How we behave and look makes all the difference. It makes all the difference to me. If I don't feel good with how I look, my self esteem goes down the drain and out into the Pacific Ocean.

And all this brought my trail of thought to a curious stand. What do other people do when they are on their own? How do they behave? I mean, do people still sit neatly, leg on leg, backs straight, tummies in, boobs out? Doesn't anyone ever pick his nose or burp or fart? Because I don't ever (or almost never) hear or see anyone do these things in public. If so, there must be a great deal of stored, inflammable gas in houses everywhere, and the only things stopping it from catching fire are little green balls of dried snot stuck in the depths of everyone's noses!

I, for one, look how I am. If I am feeling ok , then I am looking ok. If I feel a disaster, than most probably I look like my wardrobe.. the inside of it. And this is irrelevant of where I am and with whom I am. So basically I burp and fart, but oh so very discreetly.. and very rarely somehow. But because I am always like that! No effort there. On the other hand, right now I am sitting leisurely on the sofa, legs outstretched, hair pulled up in a bun and wearing a shorts that is to the top what I am to Wee Wee Xplot 13 in some galaxy a gazzilion million light centuries away. I would NOT appear like this in public, even if public was the greengrocer guy. I am not saying that people should burp and fart and swear and shout in public like they do in the privacy of their homes. Because that shouldn't be done so often, even in the privacy of a home.

So, my suggestion is that even if life makes us wear another face and another character (and that's why they call it a bitch) we should always allow ourselves the time of being ourselves comfortably every single day. For those 30minutes, undo that tie, walk about in your underwear, ditch the heals, remove all the make up and just put on a smile. PAUSE and savour yourself in essence.